The Bright Red Bikinis
by DeannaSmith
Summary: Barney, Barbie, and Tellytubbie suits! What will happen to Frodo and all of the prisoners when everybody goes MAD! R&R PLEASE! Flame if you must.
1. Attack on Frodo!

A/N: The Lord of the ring characters do not belong to me. Just the story.  
  
The Worst Day Ever.  
  
Chapter one: Bright Red Bikinis.  
  
One day, Frodo Baggins was just as happy as could be.  
  
He was so happy that he went for a long walk.  
  
As he was walking he heard something move in the bushes. He turned around and saw Bilbo, Aragorn, and Gandalf jumping out of the bushes with bright red bikinis on.   
  
"AAAHHHH! WHY THE CRAP ARE YOU WEARING BRIGHT RED BIKINIS?!" Yelled Frodo.  
  
"Frodo don't you know that it is the new style?" Asked Aragorn.  
  
"NO! Why would I go around witha bright red bikini on?!" Yelled Frodo at Aragorn.  
  
"Frodo it is cool!" Said Bilbo.  
  
"No it is not!" Yelled Frodo.   
  
"Yes it is!" Said Gandalf.  
  
"Here try one on!" Said Aragorn.  
  
"No." Answerd Frodo.  
  
"Pleassse?" Said Gandalf.  
  
"No." Answerd Frodo again.  
  
"Pretty Pleassse?" Said Bilbo.  
  
"NO! I am not going to wear a bright red bikini!" Yelled Frodo.  
  
"Why not?" Asked Aragorn.  
  
"Because it is stupid Aragorn." Said Frodo.  
  
Right then, Bilbo, Aragorn, and Gandalf all at once attacked him.  
  
"What the crap are you doing to me?!" Yelled Frodo.  
  
Frodo looked down to see what they had put on him and they had put a........RED TELLYTUBBY SUIT ON HIM!  
  
"Why the crap am I wearing a red tellytubby suit?! AAAAHHHHH!!!!!!" Yelled Frodo.  
  
"Because it is also cool!" Aragorn told Frodo.  
  
Frodo tried to take it off but it would not come off!  
  
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A/N: Hope you liked it! This is the first chapter though I will definitly continue! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!   
  
PLEASE REVIEW! 


	2. In The Cave

The Bright Red Bikinis  
  
Chapter Two: Barney and Tellytubbys.  
  
Bilbo, Aragorn, and Gandalf all took Frodo to there hidden cave.   
  
While there, Frodo found Pippen and Merry tied up with Pippen wearing a yellow tellytubby suit and Merry wearing a purple one.   
  
"Eeeewwww!!!!" Said Merry.  
  
"Gross!" Said Pippin.  
  
"What?" Said Frodo.  
  
"Look what you are wearing!" Said Merry.  
  
"Look what I am wearing! You are wearing the same thing only a different color." Yelled frodo.  
  
"Oh." Said Pippen and Merry together.  
  
"Hm...where is Sam?" Asked Merry.  
  
"I don't know." Answerd Pippen.  
  
"Um...you guys? Why don't we just escape right now while they are not looking." Whispered Frodo.  
  
"WHAT?! I CAN'T HEAR YOU!" Yelled Pippen. "DID YOU SAY THAT YOU WANTED TO ESCAPE WHILE THEY ARE NOT LOOKING?!"  
  
"Pippen shutup!" Whispered Frodo.   
  
But it was to late. Gandalf started walking over to them in his bright red bikini.  
  
"FOOL OF A TOOL!" Yelled Gandalf.  
  
"Um... Gandalf you mean fool of a Took." Frodo corrected him.  
  
"Um... Yeah, that's right...anyway...YOU FOOL OF A TOOK!" Yelled Gandalf.  
  
"How dare you wake the evil spirites of......LEGOLAS!!!!!" Gandalf yelled this as if they would wake Legolas up and he would come and kill them all.  
  
"Bilbo, Should we bring out our other prisoner, Elrond." Aragorn asked Bilbo.  
  
"Yes, bring him out." Said Bilbo.  
  
Aragorn walked away for a minute.   
  
In the mean time, Frodo looked around in the cave they were in. Frodo noticed that there were hairspray cans hanging all over the walls. Just like the ones that Legolas had.  
  
Aragorn came back with Elrond behind him. And Elrond was in a......BARNEY SUIT!!!!!!!  
  
"Eeeeeeewwwwwww!" Yelled all of the Hobbits.  
  
"What? What? WHAT?!" Yelled Elrond From behind Aragorn.  
  
"Well you don't look any better than I do!" Said Elrond to the Hobbits.  
  
"So they captured you too, huh." Said Elrond.  
  
"Yep." Answerd Pippen.  
  
Aragorn came walking over to them. "You will be having a very well treat my lads! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!" Aragorn straitened up, and walked back over to Bilbo and Gandalf.  
  
"What do suppose that means?" Asked Merry.  
  
"I don't know." Answerd Frodo.  
  
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A/N: What will happen to the Hobbits and Elrond? Will they survive what Gandalf, Bilbo, and Aragorn are going to do to them?  
  
Find out next time on...The Bright Red Bikinis! Review please? And I really need a beta! Anyone out there?  
  
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	3. Pee

The Bright Red Bikinis  
  
Chapter Three: Pee  
  
"Me lads you will have you'r treat now! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!" Aragorn screamed.  
  
"Aragorn shut up." Said Bilbo.  
  
"Fine!" Answerd Aragorn back to him.  
  
Just then the cave door swung open. And in came Borimier with Sam in a green Tellytubby suit also!  
  
"NO! Sam have they gotten you too?!" Yelled Frodo.  
  
"Yes Frodo they have captured me. I was just trying to take a big dump when he ran in and put this...this..THING on me!" Sam said this pointing at the green tellytubby suit he had on.   
  
"You pore thing! WELL HOW DO YOU THINK WE FEEL?!" Said Merry.   
  
Sam glared at him then sat with the others waiting for what there doom was.  
  
HA HA HA! YES! IT IS FINALY COMPLETED! Yelled Gandalf.  
  
Gandalf,Borimir,Bilbo, and Aragorn turned around each honding a tube in wich there was something yellow inside it what was it?  
  
They took them the tubes and shoved them in there mouths!  
  
"Drink it up me lads!" Said Aragorn.  
  
Frodo tried to hold back but he had to drink it whatever it was. And so he drank it. They all drank it. Then Gandalf,Bilbo,Aragorn, and Borimier took the tubes out of there mouths.  
  
"HA HA HA HA!" Yelled Gandalf. "They have dranken it all let us watch them suffer now!"  
  
"Hey this is actually pretty good!" Said Sam.  
  
"Yeh that was teriffic!" Said Pippen.  
  
"Fantastick!" Said Frodo,Merry, and Elrond together.  
  
"What!" Yelled Aragorn. "You mean that you aren't suffering any at all?"  
  
"Nope!" They all said together.  
  
"Can we have more?" Asked Pippen.  
  
"But that was..well...it was my...pee pee." Said Bilbo.  
  
"EEEWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" They all screamed togther.  
  
"We are all going to DIE!" Screamed Elrond.  
  
"Well yeh Elrond everybody dies eventually." Said Aragorn.  
  
"Never mind I don't want more!" Yelled Pippen.  
  
A/N: Yeh I know that it was kinda short but oh well. The Fourth chapter will be on soon! PLEASE REVIEW?!  
  
Oh yeah thanks for all the ofers for a beta but I don't nead one anymore...sorry. But thanks for offering!  
  



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